Let me tell you a story.
I used to be somebody. I don't
mean to toot my own horn (in reality, I do), but I was good at what I did. I was really good at it. Out in the workforce, there are accolades to
gain, plaques to be given, stories to be written in the news, congratulations
thrown about for achievements - it is a
pretty "pat yourself on the back" kind of world out there, and it
feels good. And in that world, I was
somebody to a lot of people.
Then I decided to stay home with our kids.
As a stay-at-home mom, you choose to lose your identity (or
at least that is the choice I made). I
became, "(insert child's name here)'s mom." You choose to give up the
chance of accolades, plaques, news articles, and congratulations. You choose to give up being a somebody.
In exchange for being a somebody to those out there, you
become an everything to those in here.
There is a huge amount of responsibility that comes with
being somebody's everything. When you
are an everything, your strengths and mostly your failures shine brighter. They are reflected in the eyes of those who
see you as everything.
When I was a somebody, I did it well. But...
For every judicial meeting I conducted, another somebody out
there could have done it.
For every handbook I wrote, another somebody could have
written it.
For every meeting I conducted, another somebody could have
ran it.
Sure, maybe they wouldn't have done it as marvelously as I
did (sarcasm), but they could have done it.
They could have earned the accolades, the plaques, the news stories, and
the congratulations.
When you are an everything, you are irreplaceable.
That is why I chose to stay home with my kids. That is why I chose to give up being a
somebody.
The world out there has so many shiny things. It is enticing. It is delicious. In my little world, where I am everything
there are no shiny things (besides the dishes I so marvelously cleaned). It is intimate. It is long-lasting. It is home.
Someday, maybe my children will be somebodies.
Someday, I hope my children will be somebody's everything.
